Borussia Dortmund 4 v 1 PSG

Oh dear cor blimey didn't see that coming.

PSG got off to a horror show as Tossaint was sent off in the 5th minute. After they went a goal behind, Matt Harrison's 'awesome-tactics-to-rescue-a-game TM' kicked in. Unfortunately, these tactics didn't anticipate being down to 10 men, which meant that PSG played out the match with only 2 defenders! Dortmund took full advantage, hammering home PSG's first drubbing of the season. Matt Harrison wasn't too despondent though; "We're top of the table and still in every cup. One defeat doesn't ruin a season," said the shockingly handsome supremo with a suave smile to the press.

He was then asked about PSG's disciplinary record. The Parisian's have been plagued by suspensions this season, and lose Toussaint and Idriss Fares for the next game. "I have told the lads to get stuck in a bit more," he said, nodding sagely, "but make sure that the ref doesn't see."